Movie Review Black Los Angeles

BlackNLA Movie Reviews

*****THE REEL DEAL: Reviewz from the Street*****

by Edwardo Jackson

BIASES: late 20s black male; frustrated screenwriter who favors action, comedy, and glossy, big budget movies over indie flicks, kiddie flicks, and weepy Merchant Ivory fare

SNAKES ON A PLANE (R)

MOVIE BIASES: Get these motherf***in' snakes off my motherf***in' review! Pre-sold!
MAJOR PLAYERS: Samuel L. Jackson (Pulp Fiction), Julianna Marguiles (Ghost Ship), Kenan Thompson (Fat Albert), and director David R. Ellis (Final Destination 2)

"I'm not going to see that." Good, PPG - this movie is not FOR you. Not every movie has to save the race, advance society, or better ourselves. Sometimes I just need to turn my brain off and see some sex and snakes and stunts while my friend PPG goes off to save the world. Good luck with that, girl. I'll be over here in the multiplex watching Sam Jackson scream about getting some thirteen-letter snakes off his thirteen-letter plane.

Sean Jones (Nathan Phillips) witnesses the murder of a federal prosecutor at the hands of nefarious gangster Eddie Kim (Byron Lawson). FBI agent Neville Flynn (Jackson) convinces Sean to testify against Eddie in Los Angeles while under federal protection. On the trans-Pacific flight from Hawaii to LA, Eddie Kim's people have unleashed a zooful of poisonous, pissed off snakes onboard in order to
kill Sean, bring down the plane, or both. But not if Flynn has anything to do with it.

Pre-fab camp classic (just add venom), "Snakes" is deliciously tacky, a B-movie that thinks it's a B-movie and wears its B-ness as proudly as an A+. The script (needlessly cobbled together by four credited writers) is ridiculously on the nose, with groan-to-laugh inducing, disposable cliches such as "I need you to be strong" tossed about like stale movie house popcorn. Where "Snakes" does get some fang for its buck is with the inventive, freaky, scary good snake attacks. You gotta love these pheromone-juiced reptiles ("Well that's good news," says Jackson's Flynn dryly. "Snakes on crack."), the most sexually predatory pests in history (you may never feel safe in an airplane bathroom again). Along with amusing innovations like the Snake Cam (or "Snake-Vision," I like to call it - a greenish, reptilian point of
view that incited third grade giggles in me whenever presented), Ellis invokes outrageous, great fun, concocting even more outlandish deaths and human retaliations than the next. Between the aerial histrionics of turbulence, pilot incapacitation and error, as well as snake assaults that ratchet up the fast and venomous action, Ellis creates a movie through which it is impossible to sit still or quietly.

This ain't "Snakes on Broadway," it's "Snakes on a Plane." Byron Lawson's a well-cut but horrendously acted gang lord as Eddie Kim. Rachel Blanchard's strawberry blonde hair is as appealing as her performance. Ditto for Julianna Marguiles' feathered, flight attendant/hair. Besides our hero, only Flex Alexander's "Awwwwight," Diddy-ish, germphobic rap star Three Gs, auteur behind the hit "My
Booty Go Thump," offers a semi-interesting performance - but mostly for the paranoia.

Sam, of course, does Sam. As has been widely reported, he took on this role for the title alone. As has been widely reported, the Internet community also inspired the latest profane entry into the pantheon of Samuel L. Jackson angry one-liners. And as also been widely reported, the reshoots made after production had wrapped were egged on by the fan craze and Jackson himself in order to beef up the movie from a punkass PG-13 to a kickass R. Flying on the strength of his whole toolbox of Sam Jackson incredulous looks and sarcastic, take-no-crap remarks, "Snakes" holds its own on both the human and serpent sides.

In spite of a wholly preposterous (is there any other kind in a movie this aggressively ludicrous?), convenient non-twist at the end and a surprisingly tame Trevor Rabin (Armageddon) score, "Snakes on a Plane" is as reckless and fast-paced as a runaway airline drink cart. To quote the perpetually exclamatory Samuel L. Jackson, "People either want to see this movie or they don't. So let 'em know: If you're coming to see this movie, you're going to see some deadly-ass snakes. That's what it should be called. 'Deadly-Ass Snakes on a Plane.'" I'm with you, Sam, even if it takes the guesssssts of honor a half hour to arrive. For all you who want depth and meaning and quality, y'all can join PPG down the hall at "World Trade Center." In an age where I can't even bring a gingerale on a flight now, I could use a good scream and a good laugh. Oh, and some motherf***ing snakes on my
motherf***ing screen.

@@@ REELS
(THREE REELS)
It's pretty hot – go give it a shot.

Like what you read? Agree/disagree with The Reel Deal? Think he's talkin' out his...HUSH YO' MOUF! (I'm only talkin' about The Reel Deal!) Email him at ReelReviewz@aol.com!

Edwardo Jackson is the author of the novels EVER AFTER and NEVA HAFTA, (Villard/Random House), a writer for UrbanFilmPremiere.com, and an LA-based screenwriter. Visit his website at www.edwardojackson.com




			BlackNLA Movie Reviews ***THE REEL DEAL: Reviewz from the Street* by Edwardo Jackson BIASES: late 20s black male; frustrated screenwriter who favors action, comedy, and glossy, big budget movies over indie flicks, kiddie flicks, and weepy Merchant Ivory fare SNAKES ON A PLANE (R) MOVIE BIASES: Get these motherfin' snakes off my motherfin' review! Pre-sold! MAJOR PLAYERS: Samuel L. Jackson (Pulp Fiction), Julianna Marguiles (Ghost Ship), Kenan Thompson (Fat Albert), and director David R. Ellis (Final Destination 2) "I'm not going to see that." Good, PPG - this movie is not FOR you. Not every movie has to save the race, advance society, or better ourselves. Sometimes I just need to turn my brain off and see some sex and snakes and stunts while my friend PPG goes off to save the world. Good luck with that, girl. I'll be over here in the multiplex watching Sam Jackson scream about getting some thirteen-letter snakes off his thirteen-letter plane. Sean Jones (Nathan Phillips) witnesses the murder of a federal prosecutor at the hands of nefarious gangster Eddie Kim (Byron Lawson). FBI agent Neville Flynn (Jackson) convinces Sean to testify against Eddie in Los Angeles while under federal protection. On the trans-Pacific flight from Hawaii to LA, Eddie Kim's people have unleashed a zooful of poisonous, pissed off snakes onboard in order to kill Sean, bring down the plane, or both. But not if Flynn has anything to do with it. Pre-fab camp classic (just add venom), "Snakes" is deliciously tacky, a B-movie that thinks it's a B-movie and wears its B-ness as proudly as an A+. The script (needlessly cobbled together by four credited writers) is ridiculously on the nose, with groan-to-laugh inducing, disposable cliches such as "I need you to be strong" tossed about like stale movie house popcorn. Where "Snakes" does get some fang for its buck is with the inventive, freaky, scary good snake attacks. You gotta love these pheromone-juiced reptiles ("Well that's good news," says Jackson's Flynn dryly. "Snakes on crack."), the most sexually predatory pests in history (you may never feel safe in an airplane bathroom again). Along with amusing innovations like the Snake Cam (or "Snake-Vision," I like to call it - a greenish, reptilian point of view that incited third grade giggles in me whenever presented), Ellis invokes outrageous, great fun, concocting even more outlandish deaths and human retaliations than the next. Between the aerial histrionics of turbulence, pilot incapacitation and error, as well as snake assaults that ratchet up the fast and venomous action, Ellis creates a movie through which it is impossible to sit still or quietly. This ain't "Snakes on Broadway," it's "Snakes on a Plane." Byron Lawson's a well-cut but horrendously acted gang lord as Eddie Kim. Rachel Blanchard's strawberry blonde hair is as appealing as her performance. Ditto for Julianna Marguiles' feathered, flight attendant/hair. Besides our hero, only Flex Alexander's "Awwwwight," Diddy-ish, germphobic rap star Three Gs, auteur behind the hit "My Booty Go Thump," offers a semi-interesting performance - but mostly for the paranoia. Sam, of course, does Sam. As has been widely reported, he took on this role for the title alone. As has been widely reported, the Internet community also inspired the latest profane entry into the pantheon of Samuel L. Jackson angry one-liners. And as also been widely reported, the reshoots made after production had wrapped were egged on by the fan craze and Jackson himself in order to beef up the movie from a punkass PG-13 to a kickass R. Flying on the strength of his whole toolbox of Sam Jackson incredulous looks and sarcastic, take-no-crap remarks, "Snakes" holds its own on both the human and serpent sides. In spite of a wholly preposterous (is there any other kind in a movie this aggressively ludicrous?), convenient non-twist at the end and a surprisingly tame Trevor Rabin (Armageddon) score, "Snakes on a Plane" is as reckless and fast-paced as a runaway airline drink cart. To quote the perpetually exclamatory Samuel L. Jackson, "People either want to see this movie or they don't. So let 'em know: If you're coming to see this movie, you're going to see some deadly-ass snakes. That's what it should be called. 'Deadly-Ass Snakes on a Plane.'" I'm with you, Sam, even if it takes the guesssssts of honor a half hour to arrive. For all you who want depth and meaning and quality, y'all can join PPG down the hall at "World Trade Center." In an age where I can't even bring a gingerale on a flight now, I could use a good scream and a good laugh. Oh, and some motherfing snakes on my motherf**ing screen. @@@ REELS (THREE REELS) It's pretty hot – go give it a shot. Like what you read? Agree/disagree with The Reel Deal? Think he's talkin' out his...HUSH YO' MOUF! (I'm only talkin' about The Reel Deal!) Email him at ReelReviewz@aol.com! Edwardo Jackson is the author of the novels EVER AFTER and NEVA HAFTA, (Villard/Random House), a writer for UrbanFilmPremiere.com, and an LA-based screenwriter. Visit his website at www.edwardojackson.com © 2004, Edwardo Jackson